SO THIS GUY IN MY ENGLISH IS DOING A PROJECT FOR BIO WHERE HE GETS A DUCKLING TO IMPRINT ON HIM SO HE JUST CARRIES IT AROUND WITH HIM TO ALL OF HIS CLASSES AND I SWEAR THIS DUCK IS THE MOST WELL BEHAVED FUCKING POULTRY IVE EVER SEEN IT JUST SITS ON HIS DESK QUIETLY AND SOMETIMES HE PUTS IT IN HIS POCKET AND IT JUST SLEEPS LIKE WOW YOU GO DUCKY
So my mom and I have been working the same waitress job for 5-6 years now. She had been waitressing years before, but this is recently. Anyway, about… 15 minutes ago this guy she waited on left and told her to take care. Just that. Prior to this she had talked to him about Italy. Her people are from Florence, this and that, and she said she’s never been. She’s got 8 years of art education and she’s working a waitress job. It’s pretty… Sad and disappointing, I guess. Her and my father divorced 6 years ago and she hasn’t had a real job ever. Just been stuck in a small town she’s not from.
This man who we have never seen before tipped her 1000 dollars for a trip to Italy. Walked out, not another word.
…you know. Just when I start to lose faith in humanity….Hm.
do you have a friend who’s usually a sweetheart but when they’re angry they’re the creepiest and the most cruel motherfucker you ever saw in your whole life
i am that friend
I am that friend
Clever way of getting his features in there.
LITTLE FUCKING BEAR PANCAKES!
I WANT SOME SO I CAN DRENCH THEM IN MAPLE SYRUP OH MY GOD
THIS IS SO CUTE I DON’T EVEN LIKE PANCAKES
|everyone:||it's just a book|
|you:||YOU KNOW NOTHING|
|everyone:||it's just a tv show|
|everyone:||it's just a movie|
|everyone:||it's just a...|
|you:||YOU HAVE LOST THE RIGHT TO SPEAK|
The first and last mentions of Severus Snape.
I like how his last mention answers the first.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Son
(°ʖ°) Yeah Pop
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) swag
(✿ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) honey are you trying to scare our son again
what is the purpose of training bras??? what are we trying to teach the boobs
they are trained to be the very breast
This needs to get 1 million notes seriously
MUST reblog this
What has this come to?
The degradation of society (morality too).
this couldn’t be more accurate, and depressing :/
• If Barbie were an actual women, she would be 5’9” tall, have a 39” bust, an 18” waist, 33” hips and a size 3 shoe.
• Barbie calls this a “full figure” and likes her weight at 110 lbs.
• At 5’9” tall and weighing 110 lbs, Barbie would have a BMI of 16.24 and fit the weight criteria for anorexia. She likely would not menstruate.
• If Barbie was a real woman, she’d have to walk on all fours due to her proportions.
• Slumber Party Barbie was introduced in 1965 and came with a bathroom scale permanently set at 110 lbs with a book entitled “How to Lose Weight” with directions inside stating simply “Don’t eat.”
The last one…wow!